Stop With The Staring!

Hello beautifuls! Today’s post is for all the mamas, daddy’s, anyone who has a baby/ toddler in their lives. I wanted to give a little bit of encouragement to y’all, sometimes we need to hear that we are doing a good job and a great parents.

Reason I want to talk about this topic is because today I was watching my beautiful cousins Instagram stories and she was talking about her trip to Barnes and Nobles with her older son and twins to buy some books. As, I was watching her story I couldn’t help but think about how great of a mom she is. Y’all! She’s got twin boys! I can barely handle my one and only son sometimes, I can’t even imagine trying to care for two toddlers at the same time. So, I decided to message her and tell her what a great mom she is and I kept watching her stories. This is where my mommy nerve got struck.

As, she is talking about the books she bought the boys, she goes into saying that she wasn’t able to grab a book she’s been wanting to read due to the twins getting antsy. When babies and toddlers decide they had enough, they will let you know with a scream or cry that’ll probably make you rethink becoming a parent. Not gonna lie, it’s an awful noise. There’s no controlling it, you can give them anything in the world and it will not calm them down. So, my cousin was explaining that the twins got to that point. This doesn’t mean we are bad moms or bad parents.

We simply can’t control it and when you try to control it, it gets worse. These little humans are difficult little creatures and we don’t need people staring at us like, “get your life and kids together, why are you out in public.” This is what my cousin experienced. No one knows what someone is going through, so your judgey looks don’t really help either. If you think if your nasty look is going to give the mom the power to calm her kid down, you’re an idiot. I just don’t understand why people feel so high and mighty and try to shame a mom like that and make us feel like we are such failures. This is how they made my cousin feel and she felt embarrassed, I didn’t know about this until after I sent her a message saying she was a great mom. I guess it was great timing.

We know the screams and cries are intense and quite annoying. Trust me, we are hearing the same thing. Maybe, instead of giving a dirty look or stare, say “it’ll be okay” give us a nod and smile, if not just don’t look at us at all! Go about your damn day! We have a right to go out and enjoy a day out the house with actual clothes and a new scenery. It takes a lot for us to get the kids ready, get ourselves ready, pack their stuff, put them in the car, it’s a huge process. Whether we are at a restaurant, shopping, or at Barnes and Noble. Matter of a fact the many Barnes and Nobles I’ve been to had a pretty big sections for kids, they even carry toys. I’m sure they knew if kids would be going there to pick out books, it would be noisy.

Either way, just stop being so judge mental and pretending to be so perfect. You can stare at me all you want and I’m going to stare right back and go about my way to find what I came there for. After all, I had to wrestle my toddler to get into clothes, put on his shoes multiple times. I didn’t do all that for nothing. But, not everyone can do it, it’s hard to not give a crap about what other people say but, it comes a time when you have to say enough is enough and just let it be what it is.

I’m very glad I messaged my cousin and I was able to give her some words of encouragement and hopefully made her feel a tad bit better. She is an amazing mother and God gave her these beautiful twins to love and care for and God does not give us anything we can’t handle. Don’t get me wrong I’m not an expert whatsoever but, I feel like we should be encouraging and helping each other instead of making us feel like we can’t care for our kids. Every parent is different and their parenting style is different, so if you have some tips that you may think will make it better, pass it along. If the “perfect” Pattys of the world want to pass down their wisdom on how to control some toddlers, pass it on girly. Haha, I’m kidding keep it to yourself cause no one is perfect.

To all my mamas, you’ve got this! No your toddler is not the only one that wants to run around the store. No, your toddler is not the only one that wanted to take a nap on the floor and got mad when you picked them up. No, you’re baby is not the only one that is hungry and is crying to let you know. Hell, I’m 25 years old and I cry when I’m hungry. You’re not alone in this crazy thing that is called being a parent. Much love to you all!!! Hug those little booger’s extra tight, they won’t stay little for long!

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